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Finding Fault

A man was talking to his wife over the holidays.  He was feeling pretty good about his accomplishments in the past year, his new promotion, and his status that was his at this stage of his life.  He finally just said what he felt.  “You know, there just aren’t very many great people in the world today.”  His wife replied, “That’s true and in fact, there is one less than you think!”

In the man’s self-elevated view, he counted himself as soaring as an eagle among his peers.  His wife, seeking to bring him back to reality, assured him that his view of being “among the greats” was exaggerated and “life” had not yet positioned him on the level that he had placed himself or that he saw himself to be.   The old adage really is true, “We never see ourselves as others see us.”  As a result, we can come across arrogant and boastful, proud and contentious, and snooty and aloof.  In truth, all of us have lots of rough edges and each of us has some great ability.  We are capable of interaction because we need each other’s strengths to help us in our weaknesses.

It is remarkable how stringent we are in evaluating the other person’s performance when we view ours with great mercy.  Most of the time, we hold a much higher bar of expectations for the other person than we exact for ourselves.  We cannot imagine how “the other guy” can be so inconsiderate, inept, and oblivious.  And yet, when we are accused of those very same things, we take offence because we are sure that is not at all the way we are.

Those things that one cannot improve in himself or in others, he ought to endure patiently, until God arranges things otherwise. Nevertheless when you have such impediments, you ought to pray that God would help you, and that you may bear them kindly. Endeavor to be patient in bearing with the defects of others, whatever they are; for you also have many failings which must be borne by others.

If you cannot make yourself be as you would like to be, how can you expect to have another person be to your liking in every way?

We desire to have others perfect, and yet we do not correct our own faults.

We would allow others to be severely corrected, and will not be corrected ourselves.

We will have others kept under by strict laws, but in no case do we want to be restrained. And so it appears that we seldom weigh our neighbor in the same balance with ourselves.   (Thomas a’ Kempis).

Our Lord Jesus reminded us of the love we should have for others and not practice fault finding.

“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye. (Matt.7:3-5).